Hi im a new user i had my abortion 10 years ago. I blocked it out of my mind since i did it. I didnt want to feel the pain. The circumstances were very hard and at the time i thought i was making the best decision for my baby and the father and myself. I never told the babies father what i did. I lied and said i had a miscarriage. All these emotions all of a sudden hit me since in july my babies father was ****ed. I have so much regret and guilt. My due date would have been 09-22-08. I was only 4 weeks. Im trying to heal but its so hard. Now ive lost 2 people that i love. I hope my baby is now in heaven with their father. I decided to give the baby a name jordan skylar. Im not sure if it was a boy or girl. So i picked a gender neutral name. I hope my baby and their dad can forgive me. Does it get any easier?