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How do I feel About This?

Discussion in 'Guest Board' started by Aphrodite394, May 26, 2018.

  1. Aphrodite394

    Aphrodite394 Guest

    Trigger Warning: briefly mentions the continued pregnancy of another and newborn





    It all started in early November. November 9th to be exact. I got pregnant. A month later I showed symptoms and I took a test. Positive. I was terrified. My boyfriend at the time was illegal and he was the most immature guy I had ever known at the age of 26. I had no idea what to do. My family being highly religious and my mother had just said, "her parents must be ashamed of her," about a friend of mine who recently gave birth to a healthy baby boy. I felt alone. I dug myself into a hole of depression. My best friend was the only one who supported me. My boyfriend wanted to keep it. I said are you kidding me? You can barely pay rent and you never have money to feed yourself. How could you possibly provide for a child? I'm convinced he just wanted me to have the child so he could more easily become a citizen. I found out he was cheating on me and I ended things. (The day of the abortion).
    The day of my abortion I was ok at first, I knew I was doing the right thing for my self and for the child. Then when I was recovering after the procedure this girl came in screaming and crying. That's when I started overthinking. What had I done?
    I can tell you there isn't a day that goes by where I don't break down thinking about what I could have. I have no one I know who truly understands what I feel and I wish I had someone to talk to who has been through what I have. The abortion took place on January 3rd. And here I am, broken and confused looking for help here. So I don't know how to feel, I don't know if what I'm feeling is normal.

    Sincerely,
    a woman who just wants to know.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: May 26, 2018
  2. Trigeo

    Trigeo The Serial Poster Staff Member Administrator Super Moderator Moderator SRG Leader Technical Administrator Support Specialist Manager SRG A5 SRG B5 SRG C5 Yellow Rose Violet Sunflower Turquoise butterfly Flip Flops Balloon Emerald Hot Drink Halloween Bats February Angel

    Joined:
    Nov 6, 2010
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    22,314
    Gender:
    Female
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    Canada
    Hi, Aphrodite394. You'll see I added a trigger warning to alert readers of some potentially trigger content in your post. This is just one way we work to ensure a safe and comfortable healing environment for all of our members, as some topics can be upsetting post-ab. This allows readers to prepare themselves for potential triggers or to avoid the post if they feel it is necessary to their well being. :j

    What you are feeling is normal. I urge you to register for an account, as this board is only seen by volunteers and other guests, while our site has a whole community of people who understand. You will be supported every step of the way. I hope to see you on the boards. :j