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[Help!] I feel so alone..

Discussion in 'Guest Board' started by Unregistered, Dec 17, 2013.

  1. Unregistered

    Unregistered Guest

    I am a 20 year old girl. I had been hooking up with the same guy for months, we will call him John for sake of keeping names private. He hooked up with many other girls too, but for some odd reason I stayed around because the friends with benefits seemed to work at that point in my life. Around the time of finals last year, I missed my period. Thinking it was due to stress, I let it go. When I got home from school, one of my friends told me that one of my other good friends who I was planning on living with had slept with him. I was so upset and the very same day took a pregnancy test and it was positive. I was so scared so I pretended that nothing was happening. I went into a state of denial. A few weeks later, he apologized and we starting talking again. I was just about to tell him about the pregnancy and that night he stayed with me, another girl texted his phone asking if he could buy plan-b. I was hurt and decided that an abortion was the best choice. I didn't tell anyone, and went through it all by myself. This year I have been so depressed. It's all I think about, and I am so hurt and such a different person because of it. Even though I know it was the "best choice", I regret it and wish I wouldn't have been so selfish. I recently told John, and he was very unsupportive. He just said it was best and we probably won't talk for a while. He said I'll be okay eventually and that I had no other option. When I told him, I was crying so hard and he didn't even touch me or hug me or comfort me at all. I thought telling him would make me feel better, but it has made everything worse. Where do I go from here? What do I do? I feel even more alone than before. He didn't even offer to pay me back, although I wouldn't have taken his money, and he only asked if I was okay once. When I said no, he didn't say anything back. I was so disappointed with his reaction...he didn't seem to care at all. Although I will never be talking to him again, I still wish he had an idea of what I went through and am still going through.
  2. Twin Flame

    Twin Flame ...that place between sleep and awake... Alumni Volunteer Wave

    Jun 23, 2010
    (((Sweetie))) I'm sorry for the pain you are going through. Even though I don't regret my choice, I regret that I didn't take care of my body and that I had to even make a choice. Either way it is still a loss that needs to be grieved. What could have been.

    Please consider joining Passboards. This forum is only seen by admins and volunteer support. There are a lot of other women here who understand exactly what you are going through including an unsupportive ab dad. (((hug)))
  3. Buckette

    Buckette Oldie Staff Member Administrator Technical Administrator Super Moderator Moderator SRG Manager SRG Leader Moderator Manager SRG A5 SRG B5 SRG C5 SRG D5 SRG F5 SRG G5 Junior Support Specialist Manager Sapphire Spring Bouquet Emerald

    Nov 10, 2009
    Even when we know it's the best decision, it's usually from a very bad set of options.....I'm so sorry you are hurting, hun, and for all you've gone through and are going through.

    Please do register and come on the main boards.......it's a good, safe place where we all understand what you are feeling.