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I want to be pregnant again

Discussion in 'Guest Board' started by Anonymous1997, Jun 12, 2020.

  1. Trigger Warning: briefly mentions children and potential replacement baby feelings




    I've never posted on an online forum before but have been google searching and cant seem to find any shared experience which is making me feel quite alone.
    I had a termination 5 months ago and found it very difficult for a couple of months after that; crying all of the time, couldn't see children or mothers without getting upset. I wouldn't say I regretted my decision though. I felt that it was the right choice as I was going through a rough patch with my partner and wasn't sure whether we would separate.
    More recently though, I feel paranoid every month and hypervigilant to becoming pregnant again. And it's a weird mix of dread and excitement; I'm terrified it will happen and at the same time there is part of me that feels like I'm not whole without having a baby. I feel quite confused and writing this, quite sad about the whole thing.
    Has anyone had similar feelings to this?
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 13, 2020
    stardust2467 and Trigeo like this.
  2. Trigeo

    Trigeo The Serial Poster Staff Member Administrator Technical Administrator Super Moderator Moderator Support Specialist Manager SRG Leader SRG A5 SRG B5 SRG C5 SRG G5 SRG H5 Spring Tree Rainbow Sapphire Flip Flops Moon Sailboat Wave Sunflower Dolphin Emerald Heart Flower Dark Blue Flower Canada Leaves Angel

    Joined:
    Nov 6, 2010
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    Canada
    Hi, there. What you are describing is very normal. I encourage you to register for an account so that you can post on the main boards where you will be able to interact with our whole community of compassionate people. We have forums for many different topics, including “replacement baby feelings,” or RBFs, which I think you may be experiencing, and which many, many women have experienced post ab. This forum is the guest forum and can only be viewed by volunteer staff and other guests but by registering for an account you will have access to the full site. Be gentle with yourself; healing is possible. :j
     
    stardust2467 likes this.
  3. stardust2467

    stardust2467 Well-Known Member SRG H5 Jr. Support Specialist Sailboat June

    Joined:
    Jan 27, 2020
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    Female
    Location:
    New York
    Hi there,
    I can really relate to this post. I had my ab 9 months ago and still struggle with some of what you're describing. It is definetely normal to feel this way although hard, I'm sorry youre experiencing these difficult feelings. After my ab and even now, I feel a tinge of ache in my heart and body when I'm around other mothers, or see other children. When I first had my ab, my cycle also brought the same rollercoaster of feelings. I dreaded finding out I was pg again, but also felt like I hoped for it more than anything.

    All of these things can be overwhelming, you're not alone in them. I encourage you like Trigeo to make an account to join the forums if you have not already and post around. Everyone here is very supportive and there are so many topics you can join in on to share your feelings. Hugs.
     
    Trigeo likes this.